Nearly Nephews

Tell me why my boys won’t wake up

And why they should die having only ever seen red

I listen to the doctor

Insisting I shouldn’t blame myself

One of those things, murdering your unborn twins

Drowning their tiny lungs with your own blood

And I know you will tell me something worth hearing

Watchman of our fort, flying the flag

Holding my smile upright all day

Until dusk sent us home

And you’re not here, and I’m trying to hold it up

But I’m shivering, it won’t stay still

Until you get here

I’m imagining clutching your hand

Like when you kept mine warm walking to school

Like you always did when you saw them wilting

Misplaced houseplants outside in the cold

Like the day we met

Twenty years ago Inside Mother’s womb

half-crow, half man

Look at you

Perched on my porch

Staring me out with raven eyes

All pouted lips and protruding chest

Bent over double

I may as well have barbed wire

Churning inside my abdomen

I’m ready to vomit at the thought

Of you barging in and rummaging through

My home, then jutting your beak

Into my Jewelry box

A magpie dumfounded by gold

You’re supposed to be a man

And here you are acting like a bloody crow

A cheating crook, who will try anything

To swell his nest egg

Half-Crow

Hearing you knock sends me squatting

On the floor and rocking

So I can’t remember sitting still

So I can’t remember what my blood,

Sounds like when it’s the only thing in my ear

Bloody Jay on the porch

Stop mimicking the magpie

Because you will never look like him

at best you will be a half-crow

And at the moment

Your voice is plastic cheese

Ruining my expensive grater

And I’ll tell you this

My stomach cannot cope

With one more fraudulent dinner

The Most Perfect Red Dress

The truth is
I’m too young for this dress
But you don’t tell me
you’re too polite
So you leave
You make your excuses
The cut is wrong
The colour too bright

I’m going I buy it
And wear it everyday

Until it fades
Until you return
To me and my perfect red dress
And I’m just right